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“Polarization, conflict…. and dishwashers” (1st day of Rosh HaShanah, 5786 / 2025)

  “Polarization, conflict…. and dishwashers” Rabbi Robert Scheinberg, Ph.D. 1st day of Rosh HaShanah, 5786 / 2025 United Synagogue of Hoboken, NJ “In every relationship, there’s one person who loads the dishwasher like a Scandinavian architect, and one person who loads it like a rabid raccoon.”  This is, believe it or not, a quotation from one of the more fascinating and provocative articles I read this year.  It was about dishwashers and their role in couple and family conflict.  (In case you’re wondering, in my family I’m the raccoon.)  A pparently, this saying resonates in part because of how couples counselors report that a surprising amount of tension and conflict emanates from disagreements about how to load the dishwasher. Including:  Who does it and when?  What goes in the top, what goes in the bottom?  What direction do items face? How do you do cutlery - up or down?  How empty is too empty, and how full is too full?  Does it ...

Passover Seder Trivia - 5785/2025 edition

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At our synagogue's congregational seders for the last several years, we have played the following game: I have collected unusual Pesach stories, and shared three such stories with the community: two true stories, and one fictional story. Participants then have to guess which two stories are true and which one is false. (If you listen to  Wait, wait, don't tell me,  you get the idea, except that only one story is false.) You can see previous editions of this game here  http://rabbischeinberg.blogspot.com/search?q=trivia . This is what was presented at our congregational seder in 2024. Two stories are true; one is fictional. Answers at the bottom!  (Note:  All photos inspired by the stories were created by AI. )    Story #1:  Why do we dip a green vegetable in salt water at the beginning of the seder?  The most popular answer is that the salt water recalls the tears of our ancestors in slavery in Egypt.  But there’s another answer: The Tor...

Hostages, Martin Luther King Day, Inauguration Day 2025 thoughts (Mon Jan 20, 2025)

The note I sent to the United Synagogue of Hoboken community on Friday (also pasted below) focused on the mixed emotions of this week.  If anything, the blend of contradictory emotions has become even more intense since I wrote the words below on Friday.  Seeing freed hostages Emily Damari, Romi Gonen, and Doron Steinbrecher reunited with their families brings remarkable joy, even as it is horrifying to think of what they have endured, and the fate of those who are yet to be freed.  That the hostages’ freedom could be assured only by trading them for convicted terrorists serving life sentences is devastating and dangerous.  And yet the deal has broad support in Israel, with many people holding that it would be even more devastating and dangerous if the hostages were not released.  Our prayers are with the hostages who have been freed, those who remain in captivity, and their families and communities. Today (Monday, January 20) is Martin Luther King Day, when we ...